When parents separate or divorce, children often face the biggest changes. South African law recognises this and provides a helpful tool called a parenting plan, designed to guide parents in organising and how they will care for their children after separation.

The aim is simple: to ensure children continue to feel loved, secure and connected to both parents, even when the family structure changes.

 A parenting plan is essentially a written agreement between parents that explains how they will share responsibilities and make important decisions for their children. The guiding principle is always the best interests of the child, as set out in the Children’s Act 38 of 2005. By having a clear plan, parents can reduce misunderstandings, avoid conflict, and focus on what matters most—the child’s well-being.

The law encourages parents to seek help before heading to court. This might involve a family advocate, social worker, psychologist, or another qualified mediator. The goal of mediation is to help parents cooperate and resolve disagreements without turning the process into a legal battle. Courts in South Africa often prefer this approach and can even penalize parents who skip mediation, reinforcing the idea that children benefit most when parents try to work things out peacefully.

Once parents agree on a plan, it can be lodged with the office of the Family Advocate or formalised as a court order. Turning a parenting plan into a court order gives it legal authority, meaning failure to follow the plan can have real consequences. This ensures the plan is more than just a good intention—it becomes a tool that actively protects the child’s interests.

Parenting plans are also flexible. They can be updated or changed as children grow or family circumstances evolve. Only the parents, the child, or someone acting in the child’s best interests can request such changes. This adaptability means the plan can remain relevant throughout a child’s development, supporting stability and consistency.

In essence, a parenting plan acts as a roadmap for co-parenting. It provides clarity, structure, and protection for children, helping parents cooperate, reducing conflict, and keeping the child’s needs at the centre. In South African law, parenting plans are not just helpful—they are an essential mechanism for ensuring that children continue to thrive, feel secure, and maintain strong relationships with both parents, even when families are no longer living together.